Further Thoughts on the Fall of Tyrants

Yesterday, I described how - filled with optimism about the future self-determination of the Egyptian people - I found in Sainsbury's Magazine a recipe with which to pay tribute to the struggle against despotism.

Of course, my perusal of said periodical did not suddenly cease with the discovery of an appropriate North African-inspired dish. My subsequent browsing, however, was understandably colored by my musings about democratic principles and the inevitable fall of autocrats when faced with the determined expression of popular will.

This is the only explanation I can offer for a train of thought that began with a rather elegant Burford Brown chicken and concluded with a dramatic insight regarding the Divine Right of Kings.

Stick with me here: the logical path may be an arduous one, but I modestly believe it is worth the journey.

My philosophical peregrination began on page 50 of the Magazine, the whole of which was given over to a stunning ad for 'Fabulous Eggs by Fabulous Birds'. My fascination with exotic poultry is longstanding and undying, but even allowing for my peculiar enthusiasm I think anyone would agree this is easily the most striking layout in a food magazine to be seen in some time.

Eager to discover more about the origins of the remarkable egg-layer thus immortalized, I did as the ad instructed and visited Clarence Court's website, which describes in highly photogenic detail the wonders of this panoply of poultry in southwest England. Not only does this extraordinary place offer the organic eggs of several different breeds of heirloom chickens, but also those of ostriches, quails, ducks, pheasants and rheas. What bounty! What sophistication! My only complaint was that I was not one of the 'celebrated foodies' from whom Clarence Court solicited a testimonial during the design of their otherwise excellent site.

Anyway. Since I had a fresh cup of tea by my side, the urge to carry out further research was overwhelming. In the Googling that followed, I discovered an arresting piece of trivia: since the Labour government banned fox hunting in the English countryside (and quite rightly, too, in my opinion), chicken farmers (particularly organic/free-range ones) have been having trouble keeping genus Vulpes out of their henhouses. Many solutions to this increasing problem have been tried and found wanting - a challenge that must be met with some urgency, since over half a million verminous canids now infest the otherwise picturesque landscape.

How does Clarence Court protect its valuable egg layers? Why, with two alpacas, it transpires, who serve as protectors and friends to the vulnerable birds and their precious ova. I had no idea alpacas possessed such utility, but there it is. According to the farm's director, Lisa Rowe, Peruvian Huacaya alpacas will defend their charges to the death and have long been employed in Australia for the guarding of lambs and sheep.

But here's the best part. The alpacas at Clarence Court are named William and Harry.

That's right. In just a few hundred years, the oldest continuous monarchy in the world has gone in easy stages from an attitude of 'fall in loyal peasants' to the prohibition of aristocratic bloodsports to the indignity of having large fuzzy camelids named after its royal princes.

And a more salutary lesson for would-be absolute rulers I cannot imagine.